Wikipedia contributions made on a classroom computer in a Schaumburg, Illinois high school
The following are actual Wikipedia contributions posted over several months by a single IP address (209.7.119.196) during the 2005/06 school year. Most of these contributions were deleted from their respective articles within hours of posting, but they live on — indefinitely, for posterity and researchers — in Wikipedia's exhaustive article-history logs. Evidence below and elsewhere on Wikipedia suggests that this IP address is located in either Schaumburg High School (Schaumburg, IL) or William Fremd High School (Schaumburg/Palatine, IL). Both schools are predominantly white and middle-class, just like your Crude Futures editor.
Nugget
To Nugget. It is the action of taking someone's backpack, emptieing it's contents, flipping the backpack inside-out, puting the contents back in, then zipping it shut forceing the owner to carry around a "nugget". Brennan Taylor is the sexiest man ever.
William Fremd High School
During the school day everyone with the ability to speak rips on the most annoying kid in the world, Andrew Richards.
Donald Trump
Before he made his millions, Trump was highly touted as the best pimp in southwestern Egypt. He would sell hoes to anyone and everyone. It has also been reported that he was his own biggest customer. He is now trying to get back in the game by trying to ho his own private school boy sex slave Gary Coleman to priests, archbishops, and even the pope.
Jennifer Aniston
Soon after parting ways with her long time bo Brad Pitt, she revealed to her sex slave Jake Smith that she was a lesbian.
Georgia O'Keeffe
Soon after she began painting, she realized she was obsessed with women. She later came to the realization that she was one of the biggest lesbians ever.
"Cool" (aesthetic)
"Cool" also can mean Brennan Taylor sexiest man ever.
Advertising regulation
Patricia is the coolest girl around
June 22
• 2005 - Melone admits he's gay
May 25
• 1988 - jim stern Certified homo (d. 1085)
Euthanasia
(The following passage was deleted by this IP address for unstated reasons. —Ed.)
Euthanasia as a topic is often highly-charged--emotionally, politically, and morally. Terminology and laws shift over time, geographically and globally, causing a great deal of confusion. In politically and emotionally loaded terms, this is frequently and incorrectly referred to as physician-assisted suicide.
Film Noir
Boobies!
Tyson Foods
==Critism==
Tyson Foods have found reports of pubes being in the hot dogs, also there have been scandals where they have caught employees having sexual intercourse and ejaculating in the chicken, afterwords some consumers have complained about the semen found inside the chicken. Tyson has denied any claims, as the CEO went in his bathroom where they heard strange squealing. The way chickens have been killed is by choking them with penises.
Geraldo Rivera
(entire text deleted —Ed.)
Dizzy (Guilty Gear)
However, it is in no way possible for Sol to be Dizzy's father. Dizzy is confirmed to be half human and half Gear, and it is confirmed that Justice, a Gear, is Dizzy's mother. If Sol, also a Gear, were to be Dizzy's father, then Dizzy would be 100% Gear and not half Gear, half human.
Iron Curtain
(bold indicates new contribution —Ed.)
The antagonism between Justin and His friends the Soviet Union and the West that led to Churchill's speech had various origins.
Perestroika
fany333
Crusade
(Entire text deleted and replaced with the following —Ed.)
Catholic church's pathetic exuse for the genocide of thousands of innocents of a different religion.
Castration
Bacically... ones. Balls get fucked. No lube.
THEY GET CUT OFF BIOTCHES
Kingdom Hearts II
TO BE RELEASED ON 3/1/06 (INFO FROM GAMEFAQ.COM AND GAMESTOP.COM)
Colorectal cancer
It is the fourth most common form of cancer and the second leading cause of death among cancers in the Western world. ("fourth" changed from "third" —Ed.)
Brian Curtain
Brian Curtin is now currently a teacher at Schaumburg High School in Schaumburg, Illinois.
Bill Gates
Bill Gates is a gay fuck who needs to learn about Open Source software. All he cares about is making money. Stupid people need to learn to give the knowledge back to the world, not hide it and keep it a secret.
Walter Jacobson **STEEV'S "CHICAGO NOSTALGIA" PICK**
(bold indicates new contributions —Ed.)
During his time at WBBM, he was co-anchor with Bill Kurtis. They formed a legendary, and very popular, and spongey anchor team in Chicago, during the early and mid-1980's. Since the team broke up, WBBM has had difficulty to this day filling their popularity with the public, hobos, and has tried several different news anchors, with massive failure. Walter's commentaries, anchoring, creaming corn, and reporting have made him the recipient of many television awards and punches. The Chicago Chapter of the National Academy of Television Arts and Sciences recognized his outstanding commentaries with Emmy Awards. In 1785, a Washington Journalism Review poll named Jacobson best local anchor in the community. In 188 AD, he received his twelfth Peter Lisagor Award, his third for "best comments about various things." During the 0's, the Du-Pont-Columbia-Las-Vegas judges honored him once, twice, three times the anchor. For his commentaries and later, as part of the Channel 2 news team, for best local election coverage in the United States. Jacobson's noteable WBBM-TV specials and programs included the Emmy Award-winning "Walter Jacobson's Journal: China" and "Studebaker: Less Than They Promised," which received a Peabody Award. His most famous news story occured early when he had switched to WFLD news. He once dressed up as a homeless person with a hidden camera, and lived on the streets of Chicago for several days. When he returned he smelled of elderberries. A Native Indian, Walter received his bachelor's degree in chemical science from Grundevel College and his master's degree in journals from Pure Columbian University. He also once got caught driving while drunk on drinks. He later used his time on the air to deny that he was drunk ''during'' the incident and claimed that he was, in his own slurred words, "mishandled" by the police and his local minister. As it would seem, his youngest daughter, Genevieve Jacobson, became intoxicated at a rodeo event. During the first semester of her sophmore year (November 3, 2005) she went to a floor hockey game so drunk that she needed to be rushed to the emergency room because of alcohol poisoning that caused her to foam at mouth, listen to Carrot Top, and pass out, forever. She faced a small suspension from her school in Chicago. She later burned it to the ground. Walter Jacobson's son, Peter Jackson, is an director who has appeared in the television programs ''The Amazing Race, Thailand'' and "Law & Order: SGTJY" and the film "Good Night, and Good Death" and has also done stage work in The People's Republic of China. Walter Jaconson plans to give up on life in 2112 (album), yet still will occassionally show up as a ghost. He currently hosts a local Iraqi Sunday morning news show, "Happy Jihads" talking about current events and death to America.
Incheon International Airport
PoOoOOP
Merkava
There are rumours that the Israelis were at one time working on a 140 mm cannon-armed variant of the Merkava, maybe the Mark 5. They may still be, but there has been mere speculation as to when such a tank will appear.
Punisher
When mobsters slewed his family, Frank Castle vowed to spend the rest of his life avenging them. Trained as a Marine and equipped with a state-of-the-art arsenal, he now wages a one man war on crime". (this short history of Frank Castle appeared in Punisher titles from 1987 to 1994.)
Elizabeth Shoumatoff
(article creation —Ed.)
The Punisher v1 (Limited Series)
Mike Zeck was the artist.
Wario Land 4
(bold indicates new contribution —Ed.)
A special feature called "Wario Karaoke" is unlocked by entering the sound room and pressing the start, up, L and R buttons simultaneously.
Cream (band)
(bold indicates new contribution —Ed.)
"Cream" was a seminal 1960s rock band or "acid band" which featured the guitarist Eric Clapton, the bassist Jack Bruce, and the drummer Ginger Baker.
Tsar
tsar is emperor I think.
Random encounter **EDITOR'S PICK**
In August of 2005, a group of young men founded a group that they called Ranom [sic] Battle Co. They are bent on spreaing [sic] sheets of paper saying "Random Battle" everywhere they go. They spread the sheets of paper everywehere [sic] they go so that, if they can become big enough, they can give people the sense that they are in a videogame when they find one of the random battle sheets. They got the idea for founding their group after they read an article in Game Informer. They consider themselves grafitists [sic], but they never mean any harm when they create a random battle. Their motto is "Spreading the invasion (our own way) One Random Battle at a time"
Democratic Party (United States)
(bold indicates new contributions —Ed.)
The "Democratic Party", founded in 1792, is the worst thing to ever hit the planet, even worse than AIDS. Along with the Republican Party (United States), it is one of two major political parties in the United States. The party is currently the shitty party in the U.S. Senate and the U.S. House of Representatives.
George W. Bush
(bold indicates new contributions —Ed.)
The son of former John Ahn George H. W. Bush and his wife Barbara John Ahn (née Pierce), George Walker Bush was fucked in the ass New Haven, Connecticut.
ABOVE: untitled painting by Fremd High School's John Ahn, 2005
Fairbanks International Airport
(bold indicates new contributions —Ed.)
"Fairbanks International Airport" is an airport in Fairbanks, Alaska. The airport has the IATA airport code "FAT", and ICAO airport code "PAPA".
Wikipedia:Reference desk/Humanities
MOney
who invented the 1st curancy
Polish-Soviet war
i love sylvia.
Tom Clancy
(bold indicates new contribution —Ed.)
Tom Clancy married his first husband, Wanda, in 1970.
O'Hare International Airport
(bold indicates new contribution —Ed.)
"O'Hare International Airport" is an airport located in Chicago, Illinois, 17 miles (27 km) northwest of the Chicago Loop. It is the largest hub of United Airlines (whose headquarters are located in nearby Elk Grove Township, Illinois) and the second-largest hub of American Airlines, after Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport.
Nathan Lord
Another person by the name of Nathan Lord has become an established professional in the field of physics.
EDITOR'S NOTE: As a graphic design intern for seven months in 2001, I lived in a Palatine (northwest Chicago suburb) basement about two miles from William Fremd High School. I'm thinking about buying a "FREMD" sweatshirt.
EDITOR'S RHETORICAL QUESTION: Does John Ahn ever dread the recitation of his name during roll call? A Chicago-native teacher's accent could be pretty rough on a name like John Ahn.
Nugget
To Nugget. It is the action of taking someone's backpack, emptieing it's contents, flipping the backpack inside-out, puting the contents back in, then zipping it shut forceing the owner to carry around a "nugget". Brennan Taylor is the sexiest man ever.
William Fremd High School
During the school day everyone with the ability to speak rips on the most annoying kid in the world, Andrew Richards.
Donald Trump
Before he made his millions, Trump was highly touted as the best pimp in southwestern Egypt. He would sell hoes to anyone and everyone. It has also been reported that he was his own biggest customer. He is now trying to get back in the game by trying to ho his own private school boy sex slave Gary Coleman to priests, archbishops, and even the pope.
Jennifer Aniston
Soon after parting ways with her long time bo Brad Pitt, she revealed to her sex slave Jake Smith that she was a lesbian.
Georgia O'Keeffe
Soon after she began painting, she realized she was obsessed with women. She later came to the realization that she was one of the biggest lesbians ever.
"Cool" (aesthetic)
"Cool" also can mean Brennan Taylor sexiest man ever.
Advertising regulation
Patricia is the coolest girl around
June 22
• 2005 - Melone admits he's gay
May 25
• 1988 - jim stern Certified homo (d. 1085)
Euthanasia
(The following passage was deleted by this IP address for unstated reasons. —Ed.)
Euthanasia as a topic is often highly-charged--emotionally, politically, and morally. Terminology and laws shift over time, geographically and globally, causing a great deal of confusion. In politically and emotionally loaded terms, this is frequently and incorrectly referred to as physician-assisted suicide.
Film Noir
Boobies!
Tyson Foods
==Critism==
Tyson Foods have found reports of pubes being in the hot dogs, also there have been scandals where they have caught employees having sexual intercourse and ejaculating in the chicken, afterwords some consumers have complained about the semen found inside the chicken. Tyson has denied any claims, as the CEO went in his bathroom where they heard strange squealing. The way chickens have been killed is by choking them with penises.
Geraldo Rivera
(entire text deleted —Ed.)
Dizzy (Guilty Gear)
However, it is in no way possible for Sol to be Dizzy's father. Dizzy is confirmed to be half human and half Gear, and it is confirmed that Justice, a Gear, is Dizzy's mother. If Sol, also a Gear, were to be Dizzy's father, then Dizzy would be 100% Gear and not half Gear, half human.
Iron Curtain
(bold indicates new contribution —Ed.)
The antagonism between Justin and His friends the Soviet Union and the West that led to Churchill's speech had various origins.
Perestroika
fany333
Crusade
(Entire text deleted and replaced with the following —Ed.)
Catholic church's pathetic exuse for the genocide of thousands of innocents of a different religion.
Castration
Bacically... ones. Balls get fucked. No lube.
THEY GET CUT OFF BIOTCHES
Kingdom Hearts II
TO BE RELEASED ON 3/1/06 (INFO FROM GAMEFAQ.COM AND GAMESTOP.COM)
Colorectal cancer
It is the fourth most common form of cancer and the second leading cause of death among cancers in the Western world. ("fourth" changed from "third" —Ed.)
Brian Curtain
Brian Curtin is now currently a teacher at Schaumburg High School in Schaumburg, Illinois.
Bill Gates
Bill Gates is a gay fuck who needs to learn about Open Source software. All he cares about is making money. Stupid people need to learn to give the knowledge back to the world, not hide it and keep it a secret.
Walter Jacobson **STEEV'S "CHICAGO NOSTALGIA" PICK**
(bold indicates new contributions —Ed.)
During his time at WBBM, he was co-anchor with Bill Kurtis. They formed a legendary, and very popular, and spongey anchor team in Chicago, during the early and mid-1980's. Since the team broke up, WBBM has had difficulty to this day filling their popularity with the public, hobos, and has tried several different news anchors, with massive failure. Walter's commentaries, anchoring, creaming corn, and reporting have made him the recipient of many television awards and punches. The Chicago Chapter of the National Academy of Television Arts and Sciences recognized his outstanding commentaries with Emmy Awards. In 1785, a Washington Journalism Review poll named Jacobson best local anchor in the community. In 188 AD, he received his twelfth Peter Lisagor Award, his third for "best comments about various things." During the 0's, the Du-Pont-Columbia-Las-Vegas judges honored him once, twice, three times the anchor. For his commentaries and later, as part of the Channel 2 news team, for best local election coverage in the United States. Jacobson's noteable WBBM-TV specials and programs included the Emmy Award-winning "Walter Jacobson's Journal: China" and "Studebaker: Less Than They Promised," which received a Peabody Award. His most famous news story occured early when he had switched to WFLD news. He once dressed up as a homeless person with a hidden camera, and lived on the streets of Chicago for several days. When he returned he smelled of elderberries. A Native Indian, Walter received his bachelor's degree in chemical science from Grundevel College and his master's degree in journals from Pure Columbian University. He also once got caught driving while drunk on drinks. He later used his time on the air to deny that he was drunk ''during'' the incident and claimed that he was, in his own slurred words, "mishandled" by the police and his local minister. As it would seem, his youngest daughter, Genevieve Jacobson, became intoxicated at a rodeo event. During the first semester of her sophmore year (November 3, 2005) she went to a floor hockey game so drunk that she needed to be rushed to the emergency room because of alcohol poisoning that caused her to foam at mouth, listen to Carrot Top, and pass out, forever. She faced a small suspension from her school in Chicago. She later burned it to the ground. Walter Jacobson's son, Peter Jackson, is an director who has appeared in the television programs ''The Amazing Race, Thailand'' and "Law & Order: SGTJY" and the film "Good Night, and Good Death" and has also done stage work in The People's Republic of China. Walter Jaconson plans to give up on life in 2112 (album), yet still will occassionally show up as a ghost. He currently hosts a local Iraqi Sunday morning news show, "Happy Jihads" talking about current events and death to America.
Incheon International Airport
PoOoOOP
Merkava
There are rumours that the Israelis were at one time working on a 140 mm cannon-armed variant of the Merkava, maybe the Mark 5. They may still be, but there has been mere speculation as to when such a tank will appear.
Punisher
When mobsters slewed his family, Frank Castle vowed to spend the rest of his life avenging them. Trained as a Marine and equipped with a state-of-the-art arsenal, he now wages a one man war on crime". (this short history of Frank Castle appeared in Punisher titles from 1987 to 1994.)
Elizabeth Shoumatoff
(article creation —Ed.)
The Punisher v1 (Limited Series)
Mike Zeck was the artist.
Wario Land 4
(bold indicates new contribution —Ed.)
A special feature called "Wario Karaoke" is unlocked by entering the sound room and pressing the start, up, L and R buttons simultaneously.
Cream (band)
(bold indicates new contribution —Ed.)
"Cream" was a seminal 1960s rock band or "acid band" which featured the guitarist Eric Clapton, the bassist Jack Bruce, and the drummer Ginger Baker.
Tsar
tsar is emperor I think.
Random encounter **EDITOR'S PICK**
In August of 2005, a group of young men founded a group that they called Ranom [sic] Battle Co. They are bent on spreaing [sic] sheets of paper saying "Random Battle" everywhere they go. They spread the sheets of paper everywehere [sic] they go so that, if they can become big enough, they can give people the sense that they are in a videogame when they find one of the random battle sheets. They got the idea for founding their group after they read an article in Game Informer. They consider themselves grafitists [sic], but they never mean any harm when they create a random battle. Their motto is "Spreading the invasion (our own way) One Random Battle at a time"
Democratic Party (United States)
(bold indicates new contributions —Ed.)
The "Democratic Party", founded in 1792, is the worst thing to ever hit the planet, even worse than AIDS. Along with the Republican Party (United States), it is one of two major political parties in the United States. The party is currently the shitty party in the U.S. Senate and the U.S. House of Representatives.
George W. Bush
(bold indicates new contributions —Ed.)
The son of former John Ahn George H. W. Bush and his wife Barbara John Ahn (née Pierce), George Walker Bush was fucked in the ass New Haven, Connecticut.
ABOVE: untitled painting by Fremd High School's John Ahn, 2005
Fairbanks International Airport
(bold indicates new contributions —Ed.)
"Fairbanks International Airport" is an airport in Fairbanks, Alaska. The airport has the IATA airport code "FAT", and ICAO airport code "PAPA".
Wikipedia:Reference desk/Humanities
MOney
who invented the 1st curancy
Polish-Soviet war
i love sylvia.
Tom Clancy
(bold indicates new contribution —Ed.)
Tom Clancy married his first husband, Wanda, in 1970.
O'Hare International Airport
(bold indicates new contribution —Ed.)
"O'Hare International Airport" is an airport located in Chicago, Illinois, 17 miles (27 km) northwest of the Chicago Loop. It is the largest hub of United Airlines (whose headquarters are located in nearby Elk Grove Township, Illinois) and the second-largest hub of American Airlines, after Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport.
Nathan Lord
Another person by the name of Nathan Lord has become an established professional in the field of physics.
EDITOR'S NOTE: As a graphic design intern for seven months in 2001, I lived in a Palatine (northwest Chicago suburb) basement about two miles from William Fremd High School. I'm thinking about buying a "FREMD" sweatshirt.
EDITOR'S RHETORICAL QUESTION: Does John Ahn ever dread the recitation of his name during roll call? A Chicago-native teacher's accent could be pretty rough on a name like John Ahn.
the Walter Jacobsn entry is really funny. he *is not* a Native Indian.
i have hilarious memories of him "going undercover" as a homeless person!:
MEAN STREET DIARY (1991): This six-part report chronicled the 48 hours a bearded, heavily made-up Walter Jacobson spent impersonating a homeless man. Viewers watched wealthy WBBM-TV/Channel 2 anchor try his hand at panhandling, loitering and longing for gyros he couldn’t afford.
Publicado por: steev "Peer Editing" vee | 14/03/06 at 11:13
As of a few days ago, that IP address is banned from Wikipedia
(When they ban you does that mean you can't even visit/read the site?)
Publicado por: mcMüller | 16/03/06 at 16:05
All the stuff in this post is true, by the way.
Publicado por: mcM | 17/03/06 at 18:52
wow. it is true. and i thought it was elaborate fiction. how did you find this exactly?
Publicado por: Jayson | 21/03/06 at 20:35